A Writer's Reward

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In the last three days, I have been called a lecher by two girls. They were parallel flings and coincidentally both fell apart almost the same time. Let the readers be informed that there was no physicality involved. It was a misreading of my intentions that caused estrangement. Well, I am not depressed at all. I was kind of expecting such a glorious end. 

Flings move onto being love affairs if the counterparts aren't treated as human resources. But, people interest me only so long as a sense of mystery surrounds them. I start in the right direction but goaded by a sense of experimentation, I end up falling out of the relationship. But, I don't regret the disaster because now I am a writer who welcomes even the untoward with open arms. I

Now, when people narrate the sorry incidents of their lives, they pledge me to secrecy and to strictly desist from making their tale food for my writing. I am seen as a threat to their private lives. I have people telling me that a writer can never be a good friend. 

A writer wants to outlive the variety of experiences that life offers and freaks out at the possibility of infinite more. From feeling love for a stranger to feeling repulsion for the dear one, are feelings that again display amazing variety. Each strand of emotion has to be carefully observed before getting it down to writing. 

In a fling fuelled by infatuation or lust, a writer scopes out the emotional landscape to plant his experiences and later reap them in his writings. He accepts the paradoxes of life. He doesn't rule out that lust and love can occur simultaneously and also exclusive to each other. 

This attitude could be perceived as coldness. It's not coldness but an ability to scorch oneself in the sun and gaze at it steadily before giving rise to a perfect portrait of the blazing sun. A writer stakes his image, suffers neglect, goes against the dictates of his conscience, roots out the desire to be loved. It's not all that easy. You will often have words like egoist, obstinate, callous, lecher thrown at you. All this is the reward of your commitment to writing. If you have never been framed for such behaviour, you have not taken up the vocation whole-heartedly yet.

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